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  • Writer's pictureAlan Jacobs

Mindset Matters in Divorce: How to Go from Scarcity to Abundance

Every sports or business coach will tell you that mindset matters. Your mindset determines, to a large extent, whether you win or lose; whether you fail or succeed. It determines whether you’re happy or you’re miserable.

Yet somehow, when it comes to divorce, most people think that their mindset doesn’t matter. That is … if they think about their mindset at all.

The truth is that when you’re going through a divorce thinking about your “mindset” isn’t very high on your list of priorities. You’re much more worried about figuring out whether you can pay your bills and when you’re going to see your kids than you are about whether or not you’ve got a the right mindset.

In this excellent blog posting, Karen Covy writes about how, if you and your spouse can be a little open-minded and operate from a mindset of abundance rather than fear, you can create a win/win situation in your divorce, instead of a win/lose one. (… or a lose/lose situation, which happens way too often!)

You can expand your marital “pie” so that when you divide it, you both end up with more than you would have if you fought to the death trying to get the whole pie for yourself.

But you can’t possibly do that if you’re scared out of your minds and your brain is caught in a negative scarcity loop.

That’s why your mindset matters so much. Having the right mindset can literally change your divorce.

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