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  • Writer's pictureAlan Jacobs

Questions to Ask Yourself About Children and Divorce

It’s understandable to get caught up in your own needs and goals as you go through the process of divorce mediation with your spouse. But it is critical that you and your spouse also keep your children in mind throughout the process, as they will also be greatly affected by all of the decisions you make together.


In this excellent blog posting, Bryan L. Salamone offers a few questions you should ask yourselves to ensure you are acting in the best interests of your children while also meeting your own personal goals in your divorce mediation.

  • What do you and your spouse each need to feel like you are supporting each other as parents and to set yourselves up for success in a co-parenting arrangement?

  • What needs do your children currently have to feel safe and secure in their relationships with each of you moving forward?

  • What special needs will you need to accommodate for your children in your custody and co-parenting decisions?

  • What do each of you see as an optimal co-parenting relationship in the future?

  • What are each of your strengths as parents and what do you do well together?

  • What can you do to reassure your children you will both always love them and be there for them?

Any custody arrangements you settle on should be done with the children’s best interests in mind, and not your own selfish desires. You can make plans to split holiday and birthday time as needed, but as long as your children’s needs are being met first and foremost, this is the most important element of any type of custody plan.

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