There are times in our lives when we all harbor the fanciful idea that there is a magical “all-knowing, all-seeing, all-powerful” entity out there who will wave his or her wand and make everything okay for us.
Like my colleague Ada Hasloecher, while mediating separations and divorces, there are times that I’ll hear one spouse, in a fit of total frustration, spout the line: “We’ll see what a judge has to say about THAT!”
First of all, the likelihood that a judge is even going to hear your case is extremely slim. And more importantly:
Are you willing to put your life on hold for the next 2 to 3 years, waiting for the judge’s decision?
Are you willing to bear the tremendous financial cost of having your attorney prepare for trial?
Are you prepared for the good chance that you will settle “out of court” before your case even gets to the judge, despite having laid out all your hard-earned money for a trial that never occurs?
And, do you really think that the judge will make it right?
Unlikely. If the judge makes everything right for YOU, what about your soon-to-be-ex-spouse? You say you don’t care, but consider this … the judge could side with your soon-to-be-ex—and that means that YOU are the odd man/woman out. Could happen. Then what?