While divorce may end a marriage, when you’re a parent it doesn’t end the need for working together on behalf of your children. How you communicate with one another about parenting issues will affect your children today and for years to come.
In this article Rosalind Sedacca offers some tips on keeping communication with your Ex as effective as possible.
Communicate in writing
Focus on the present and the future
Prioritize your Children’s Wellbeing
Regardless of what you think about your Ex, they are your child’s other parent. Keep the focus of your communication on the children, their needs, well-being and feelings. Avoid language that puts them on the defensive such as sentences that start with “You always ….” Instead use “I” language or “Johnny said …” to address important parenting issues. Your children love both parents. For that reason alone you want to maintain cordial communication for more effective co-parenting.
Failing to comprehend the importance of creating a working, respectful, cooperative relationship between you and your child’s other parent sets you up for pain, anxiety and frustration. Even more importantly, your child feels the stress as well and it creates emotional turmoil for them.
Two adults can’t always agree on everything — especially when they’ve been divorced. But understanding that your children’s wellbeing is at stake should keep you on the path toward mature compromise and productive dialogue.